Monday, July 27, 2009

So we are idiots...

Kate: "Wanna go catch a movie or something?"
Alli: "Perhaps. What and when?"
Kate: "Drag me to Hell is on at 10 to three"
Alli: "Lock that in"
Kate: "See you there at quarter to. Be prepared to freak the fuck out!!!!"
Alli: "Holy shit!"

So it's Sunday afternoon and you're bored. Your friend texts you to see if you want to see a movie. You like your friend and you like movies so you say yes. You are an idiot...and so is your friend.

Both Kate and I are scaredy-cats, we freely and openly admit this yet we also put ourselves through watching horror films. I believe psychiatrists have a name for us but who cares what they say? If you believe the scientologists psychiatry is a load of also believe Tom Cruise is a straight man...but I digress.

So with the full knowledge that we would be scared, possibly have nightmares and suffer permanent psychological harm we went to see "Drag Me To Hell".
This was a mistake.

This movie was FUCKING SCARY! We are not saying it was well made, that the acting was top notch or even that the storyline was great. We are simply saying that this movie achieved its purpose, it scared the living shit out of us. There was jumping and screams and no, sadly, that was not the was us.

This movie had more things jumping out at you than I could count. Things jumping out or just appearing is scary!

This movie made wind scary. WIND! We are not talking cyclonic wind either. We are talking a gentle breeze. A freaking foreboding gentle breeze! A Zephyr, if you will. I've always wanted to use that word in a sentence.

This movie made a handkerchief scary, it was embroidered for god's sake!

This movie had an ending that was in a word...AWESOME!

Fortunately, this movie did not involve any "standing". People just "standing" and "looking" is just about the scariest thing ever! We are looking at you "Knowing", way too much standing in that movie!

This movie got the job done. I've checked the back seat of my car every time I've been in it since the movie. I had to make an active effort to not think about it as I fell asleep last night. Kate freaked herself out thinking there was something evil close by when really it was her cat in the laundry.

Congratulations "Drag Me To Hell" on a job well done. You are not perfect though, you know what I'm talking about...goat.

Oh and Sam Raimi if you are reading this (pretty sure you are) Kate and I think you should make a sequel. We even have a title for you.... "To Hell and Back"...You're welcome btw and we anticipate your check in the mail.

So in closing Kate and I are awesome (just look at the first word in our blog) but sometimes we are idiots (Cafe Conti know what I'm talking about). We also don't learn from our mistakes and I'm sure will torture ourselves again in the not-too-distant future.

So it was a close one but "Drag Me To Hell"?...

DECISION:AWESOME (with some elements of flawsome...goat)

No comments:

Post a Comment